Mixed feelings
Nov. 4th, 2008 11:04 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mis_creationNot about the election. But in general, mixed feelings about life.
It's really weird to feel deeply cranky and unhappy with one's own life while being happy about the results of a national election.
I'm PMS-ing, so I'm probably blowing things out of proportion, but things have been bugging me this last week.
1. Okay, this isprobably petty, but at the Halloween party thingy we had, I made a music mix. And I warned people it was mostly random and weird-ass music before they put it in. I'm realistic, I know not everyone has the same taste as me. They put it in anyway. So, while I'm busy making desert in the kitchen, I hear something that's not my CD come on. I say, "What the hell is this?" because I don't recognize it but my iTunes had messed up CDs before. And my host/boss's boyfriend had stopped the CD when he heard an Evanescence song. I'm like, "You could've just fast-forwarded." And he made this face like, "If it had Evanescence on it I don't want to listen to it anymore." There were, like six tracks after that, including Rob Zombie and Mussgorsky's Night on Bald Mountain. I was mad he arbitrarily decided to stop the CD when he didn't like one damn track. Grr.
2. Work today pissed me off. I got into a political discussion with my friend Laci, and she was saying that if she were president she would overturn Roe v. Wade totally. Her stance is that if you're irresponsible, you should have the baby. She's just...grr! So closed-minded, but I like her anyway. What the hell is that? And one of my co-workers insists on calling me by a nickname I HATE with the fire of a thousand suns.
3. I was closing tonight, shelving shift. I hate shelving in the first place, but I really hate cleanup. I know for a fact that circulation was slow tonight because it was slow everywhere. I asked for help on the cleanup because I'm pretty slow and I had to do the entire second floor. Which takes a while. So, not only do I not get help when they weren't doing anything else, the reference librarians shut off most of the lights in the magazine/nonfiction/new books sections, where I was finishing up. So I get out of work 15 minutes late and cranky because no one helped me even though they weren't doing anything else and GRR.
4. I stopped by the grocery store after work to pick up some corn meal. I called home to see if anything else was needed. No answer. Fine, I figured mom was on the phone. So I wandered around, resisted the $1-for-four cupcakes, resisted the ice cream, and got pomegranite juice, extra sharp cheddar, and corn meal. So finally I get in the car to come home and my sister calls me back. Now dealing with my sister is difficult enough for me when I'm in a good mood. She gives me the message that Dinah called (Hi Dinah!) to celebrate. And I tell her that I'm cranky and don't really feel like talking and she stays on the phone to talk at me some more, and I say I'm really happy about the election (because I am!) but I'm really fucking cranky and can't work up much enthusiasm right now. And then she gets pissed at me.
Oh, and when I tell her I picked up corn meal she said, "Well, that's something." Fuck. you. I do more around here than you ever have so kindly STFU.
But, to counteract all the bitching, I do have good things:
1. The other day was windy, and while I was taking Nefret to and from the vet, there were a ton of horses running. I don't know if you've ever seen a herd of horses running around a big pasture, but it is one of the greatest things about living in the country. And when I was driving back a different set of horses were running and bucking and playing much closer to the road and it was just gorgeous.
2. Dinah called. Hi Dinah! Sorry I'm cranky tonight and won't call you back, but I can't muster up the right sort of enthusiasm right now, so I hope you'll forgive me.
3. Other than the music thing the party on Halloween was awesome. Talked and laughed until my cheeks were sore, had great food (the caramel apple bars are fabulous) and got to hang out with people I like. All good, really.
4. I still love my job, even when I have to shelve.
5. I added 2k more words to NaNo today, but didn't get much else done. I'm hoping to do better tomorrow, since it's my day off. I have a whole to-do list for tomorrow, too...
6. yay! My NCIS season 2 download should finish soon.
Aaand on that slightly more up-beat note, I'm...going to go write.
It's really weird to feel deeply cranky and unhappy with one's own life while being happy about the results of a national election.
I'm PMS-ing, so I'm probably blowing things out of proportion, but things have been bugging me this last week.
1. Okay, this is
2. Work today pissed me off. I got into a political discussion with my friend Laci, and she was saying that if she were president she would overturn Roe v. Wade totally. Her stance is that if you're irresponsible, you should have the baby. She's just...grr! So closed-minded, but I like her anyway. What the hell is that? And one of my co-workers insists on calling me by a nickname I HATE with the fire of a thousand suns.
3. I was closing tonight, shelving shift. I hate shelving in the first place, but I really hate cleanup. I know for a fact that circulation was slow tonight because it was slow everywhere. I asked for help on the cleanup because I'm pretty slow and I had to do the entire second floor. Which takes a while. So, not only do I not get help when they weren't doing anything else, the reference librarians shut off most of the lights in the magazine/nonfiction/new books sections, where I was finishing up. So I get out of work 15 minutes late and cranky because no one helped me even though they weren't doing anything else and GRR.
4. I stopped by the grocery store after work to pick up some corn meal. I called home to see if anything else was needed. No answer. Fine, I figured mom was on the phone. So I wandered around, resisted the $1-for-four cupcakes, resisted the ice cream, and got pomegranite juice, extra sharp cheddar, and corn meal. So finally I get in the car to come home and my sister calls me back. Now dealing with my sister is difficult enough for me when I'm in a good mood. She gives me the message that Dinah called (Hi Dinah!) to celebrate. And I tell her that I'm cranky and don't really feel like talking and she stays on the phone to talk at me some more, and I say I'm really happy about the election (because I am!) but I'm really fucking cranky and can't work up much enthusiasm right now. And then she gets pissed at me.
Oh, and when I tell her I picked up corn meal she said, "Well, that's something." Fuck. you. I do more around here than you ever have so kindly STFU.
But, to counteract all the bitching, I do have good things:
1. The other day was windy, and while I was taking Nefret to and from the vet, there were a ton of horses running. I don't know if you've ever seen a herd of horses running around a big pasture, but it is one of the greatest things about living in the country. And when I was driving back a different set of horses were running and bucking and playing much closer to the road and it was just gorgeous.
2. Dinah called. Hi Dinah! Sorry I'm cranky tonight and won't call you back, but I can't muster up the right sort of enthusiasm right now, so I hope you'll forgive me.
3. Other than the music thing the party on Halloween was awesome. Talked and laughed until my cheeks were sore, had great food (the caramel apple bars are fabulous) and got to hang out with people I like. All good, really.
4. I still love my job, even when I have to shelve.
5. I added 2k more words to NaNo today, but didn't get much else done. I'm hoping to do better tomorrow, since it's my day off. I have a whole to-do list for tomorrow, too...
6. yay! My NCIS season 2 download should finish soon.
Aaand on that slightly more up-beat note, I'm...going to go write.
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no subject
Date: 2008-11-07 12:09 pm (UTC)Also, way to go on participating in NaNoWriMo. I keep debating about trying for it, but I don't know if I can do it.